Saturday, March 12, 2016

The "Only Available Parent" 
*as a disclaimer to the pic above, this also applies to the many men that are military spouses too! 
Recently there has been a lot going on in my life and the lives of my family members. My DH is a member of the military (that's about all we'll say there for security reasons), and my son is a 16 year old who thinks mom is his personal taxi... well okay, maybe he doesn't think that, but it feels that way sometimes! 

As a military spouse a lot of the time you are the "only available parent" for just about everything. Even when your spouse isn't deployed, or on TDY, or doing some sort of crazy military thing... the list goes on! 

At some point in our journey as a military family I just became used to this as our norm! Not that I liked it, it just is what it is. If our son had a parent teacher conference day, I usually went alone (or didn't go at all because, lets face it, I'm busy too and sometimes things just don't happen, even when you want them too). If our son was sick and had to go to the doctor, then I was the one to make the appointment and take him. If our son wanted to hang out with his friends, I was the one to help schedule between the parents and decide who's house was going to be bombarded by teenage boys! 

This week something amazing happened!!!! My husband took charge and became the "only available parent"!!!!

This is a busy week for me at work. Finals week for my high school students before we start a new block, and parent teacher conferences. I've been bogged down in spreadsheets, calls, and emails, and just plain old begging for students to finish their work. Meanwhile my son decides (like he really had a choice) to get a nasty infected ingrown toenail. It isn't the first one, and it probably won't be the last, but I had made a call for an appointment, but it was way out at the end of March (and I called in February... ugh!), but it was getting really bad and needed medical attention. 

I was contemplating how I was going to pull this off this week when my husband looked at me and said... "you know there is another parent in this family!" 

It took me off guard. I mean, I know he's here, but so many times he's just not available for this kind of stuff that I don't even consider asking! (Usually when I do his schedule is booked for the next five months, so I just stop asking!) 

So I gratefully handed this problem over to him and let him deal with the phone calls, the referrals, and the final judgement of Urgent Care over ER visit! 

It was a weird game to watch him juggle his own life, and finally find a good time to get our son seen, but he did it! (Not that I didn't think he could... its just... well I'm usually the "only available parent")

Sometimes as a mil spouse we get so used to doing things on our own, caring for the family, paying the bills, taking kids to appointments, playdates, you know... EVERYTHING... we forget that we have a partner in crime to help us. Sometimes we feel guilty because we know our spouse has just as much of a crazy schedule as ours, but it seems more important because... well the "freedom on which we sleep under" depends on them! Sometimes we just get in that super spouse mode and we forget... We Just Forget! 

So take some time to remember this week... even if you aren't a military spouse... that you do have someone you can go to, ask to tag team things with, and be thankful. There are many out there who do not have that ability! Those are my heros!  (Along with my husband of course!) 

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